My dearest baby angel Justine,

We (Mommy, Daddy and ate Celine) are supposed to confirm your gender tomorrow. Unfortunately, we were devastated to know that we will no longer have the chance to be with you anymore this December. It was really heartbreaking not to hear your heartbeat anymore…and to see you as a sleeping angel instead of an active kicking tiny angel in the ultrasound monitor.

Mommy is very sad that I can no longer feel your little kicks. It was really hard for me to let you go because I love you so much. Your 19 weeks of existence in my tummy brought so much happiness, dreams and hopes to us. I can’t help but cry when your ate Celine kissed you in my tummy unaware that you are gone. Everything I do reminds me of you.

We took extra care of you and prayed for you because we are all excited to have you..and we love you so much…but Papa Jesus may have another plan for us. I love you so much my baby Justine. Someday, I will have the chance to hold you in arms and kiss you. Please tell Papa Jesus to give us enough strength to overcome the pain of losing you.

Love,

Mommy
July 13, 2012

Part Time Writer, Full Time Working Mom

Having a full time job as a bank account officer, part time article writer and a full time mom and wife is really hard. These three jobs has become part of my life, and losing one would make me feel incomplete. Among the three of course, my family is my priority. That is why I am trying to balance my full time job as an employee and my part time job as a freelancer. On the other hand, I am keeping my full time job because of the regular income and benefits that I receive.

Many of us have full time job while at the same time we earn extra income thru freelancing. I started joining Odesk in October 2011, luckily got my first contract within that month and now I get some of the jobs that I applied and earn from it. My 6 months of work experience in Odesk has been fulfilling. That is why I want to pursue my writing career until I get old.

Managing time for full time and part time jobs is not that easy. I am sharing my strategies on how I was able to cope with the situation considering that my little toddler needs quality time from her working mom. Hope the following tips might help you and I am willing to receive any comments or opinions so I can use them also in managing my time.

•     The first thing that I learned is to focus. Committing ourselves to our jobs is very important. Never try to do articles while working for the full time job. It will affect your job performance and you cannot concentrate on what you are doing. Give what is due for each job. Sometimes, when there is no much work in office or during break time, I write articles instead of checking my Facebook account. Also, as much as possible, do not accept jobs beyond your available time. I usually take jobs one at a time to build good reputation with my employers. I have my regular one article everyday job and batch articles which I only accept if I am already done with the other batch.

•    Have a time schedule. Set a consistent time each day to allow yourself to work without any interruptions. Make this a habit. It is better if you chose the time that you feel productive. One of my strategies also is applying for jobs with one week deadlines. These are usually in batches. I have more time during weekend and jobs in batches have bigger earnings. 

•     Choose your employers. Some contractors do not choose their employers and just try to apply all the jobs posted in Odesk. Choosing your employer is important. By checking their feedback rating, and their instructions, you can judge if they are professional, considerate and not spammers. Make sure also that their payment method is verified and make sure you already have a contract before writing for them.

•    Choose the job that is right for you. By knowing your strength, you can decide what articles you can write. Applying for jobs in Odesk for the first time is really hard because you don’t have the experience yet and you don’t have the feedback rating that employers can rely on. But by relying on your specialized areas, you are confident that you can accomplish the job successfully. If you will look at my Odesk profile, you will observe that I have more jobs pertaining to parenting, pregnancy and blogging. That is because, with these topics where I have first-hand experience, I can deliver quality output because I can share my own experiences without relying too much on research.

•    Have quality time for yourself and family. My full time job is 8AM to 4:30PM. Before sitting in my computer desk, I make sure that I already played with my little one and conversation with my hubby. Having quality time with your loved ones will give you inspiration in writing and at the same time you can have time to relax.

We are Three!

We started the day of our 3^rd year anniversary by attending the 9AM mass at a mall. I thank God for giving us the chance to know Him more and to love Him more after the 40 days love dare. Compared to our previous wedding anniversaries, this one is the happiest since I and hubby had finally put God in the center of our marriage.

After the mass, we let our daughter enjoy the rides in the mall. Then, we had our 2012 family picture. Our family picture speaks a thousand words. The picture speaks so much of our family’s love, happiness, dreams, hopes and commitment. Our second year of marriage has been full of trials and problems that have tested our marriage, our commitment to each other. But now that we let God guide us in our journey of marriage and parenting, we are full of hope that we can surpass everything.

After the pictorial, we had our lunch at the Rack’s. We were not able to take pictures since our little one is fussy because she had not yet taken her daytime nap.

Another Mommy Moments, Color Connection

3rd Wedding Anniversry: Sweetest Love

They say “Love is sweeter the second time around”,
But for me, love is sweetest when we have God in the center of our marriage..
I want to thank God for guiding us through the 40 days of love dare..
A journey that made us realized what true love is all about..
God has made us realized how much He loves us that He gave us the gift of loving each other unconditionally..
And I am glad that we learned to love Him more after the 40 days love dare..
May God continually guide us as we take the journey of love, respect, happiness, faith and commitment to love each other till the end..

I know as human we are imperfect individuals
But with the love of God, I believe we can surpass any trials, storms or problems that may shake us..
Because the house that we are building together in the rock of God, will never be shattered. No more giving up. Just holding on...
It is like I am holding to God’s hand as He holds you in His other hand..
To grow old with you is one of my greatest dreams..
I am glad that I had spent 3 years of my life with you and I am looking forward to spend the rest of my life with you..
Happy 3rd anniversary Bhi-mine.
I love you. Period.

Wordless Wednesday: Sexy Little Princess

 Just Another Wordless Wednesday (^^)

my two year old daughter's sexy pose! how cute!!

Wordless Wednesday: My Sweet Tot is Ready for Summer

Another Wordless Wednesday!

Fireproof Marriage

Our marriage is not a perfect one. I and hubby have petty quarrels most of the time because of our differences. They say February is the month for "Love", yet it was on this month that our marriage has encountered another trial. I was deeply hurt..I feel like I was giving up. But after a few days of soul searching I finally made a decision, to never give up.
Running away is not the answer to problems that we encounter as wife. After the incident, I and hubby watched a movie together. It took me six hours downloading the full movie from YouTube but it's worth it. The movie was great and I would recommend this to every couple who strives hard in their marriage. "Fireproof" made us realized that we should never leave our partners especially on fire. As of now, we are trying hard to save our marriage, not only for our daughter, but also for ourselves. We are currently on the 8th day of the 40 days Love Dare.

Here is my message to hubby on Valentines Day:

You are not the ideal man I’ve been wishing for..
But you taught me what true love is all about..
Not on the happy moments that we have, but on situations when unconditional love grows deeply..
We’ve been through the ups and downs..
we fight like normal couples do…
you made me cry..
I made you cry..
But whenever these things happen…when the “worse” overshadows the “better”..I am clinging to what... I promised, not only to you but also to our God..the promise of commitment to love you until my last breath..
As we build our family, it is not the love that will protect our family..
Feelings come and go..but the commitment that we promised to each other will live forever in our mind, heart and soul..
With God’s guidance, I pray that He will continually bless our marriage and nourish it with love…
To the man who made me a mother..
To the person who gives me heartaches..
To the friend who’s willing to risk his life for me..
And to the husband I know will love me forever..
Happy Valentines Day..
I love you more.

Here are some of our pictures on Valentines Day:

This is also my share to Mommy Moments

Celine Goes Barefooted

Another Wordless Wednesday... 

I let my daughter enjoy the freedom of exploring the outside world barefooted for the first time..letting her feet adapts on different situations,..even on rocky ones.. it may hurt a little, but it's fun!

My Little Toddler's New Play Area

As my little toddler grows fast and discovers her own body’s mobility, her activeness has become uncontrollable. She loves to run, climb and jump. Afraid that furniture might fall to her when she’s climbing it; I removed some of the furniture that is not fastened to the wall to prevent accidents. Childproofing is more important to me than the interior design of our home. So I rearranged her play area to a safer, more comfortable and more exciting look. I decided to put it in our master’s bedroom since she’s still sleeping with us and the other rooms have no air conditioner yet.

I placed the lightweight toys at her eye level. The hard ones were put on the lower portion to prevent her head from hard objects bump. I did not yet put her books in her play area, but I have a plan of putting the hard bound books at the lower portion also. Her other books which are easily torn will be kept inside a cabinet so she will ask for permission before getting them.

Although her play area is not that big, I felt a sense of fulfillment seeing my daughter happy with her new play area. I want to instill to her an orderly way of arranging her things. I support her for her love to her stuff toys knowing it will improve her emotional development. On the other hand, her books and other toys will develop her motor and mental skills.

This is my share to Mommy Moments

My Baby Got Amoebiasis

The month of December is the most stressful month for me for the year of 2011. Not because of the holiday season, but being the weakest month of my baby. After her emergency trip to the hospital on December 9 to 13, 2011 because of gastroenteritis, her tummy got ache again on the third week of December. She got amoebiasis. Her stool remained soft after she got well from gastroenteritis. I was alarmed when I noticed streak of blood in her watery stool with mucoidal texture. Aside from that she is crying because of abdominal pain. I remember what her pediatrician told me when she was struck with amoeba when she was only seven months; green watery stool is an indication of infection. I hurriedly take her stool for Fecalysis so that her pediatrician could have the report for her check-up.

Fecalysis report showed the following:

Color: Yellowish

Consistency: Mucoid

Red Blood Cells: 3-5/hpf

Pus Cells: 18-20/hpf

Ova/Parasites: Entamoeba histolyca cyst 0-1/hpf

How it was treated?

1.      Her pediatrician gave her home medication of 5 ml, three times a day Metronidazole (Flagyl) for ten days to treat her parasitic infection and 2.5 ml, twice a day Antibiotic (Cefixime ) for seven days to treat bacteria infection.

2.      Soft diet for two weeks, like mashed potato. Greasy foods and fruit juices that trigger diarrhea are not allowed. Sweet foods like candies, chocolates and sweet drinks are also not allowed since sugar if the food of Amoebas.

3.      We wash her butt with warm water before going to sleep to alleviate redness due to frequent bowel movement.

4.      We let her drink yogurt and Gatorade since she does not like Pedialyte.

5.      The squash seeds (buto ng kalabasa) are good for treating Amoebiasis according to elders.

Thankfully, she was better after two weeks of medication. We had a repeat Fecalysis and the amoeba and bacteria are no longer present in her stool. To prevent this kind of parasite, frequent hand washing is recommended. Avoid eating street foods and drinking juices sold in the street. We also washed our hands with soap and warm water after washing my baby to avoid contamination. Although there are remedies for some illnesses, it is better to prevent it before our children will suffer.

Wordless Wednesday: Love It!

What a sweet smile... I love you baby...

Just another Wordless Wednesday...

Wordless Wednesday: My Sweet Tot

Just another Wednesday Whites and Wordless Wednesday..

A Late Post About Christmas

I was not able to update my blog for the past few days because of many errands and unexpected events. I had noticed that December is a weak month for my baby. As I still remember it was also in the month of December when she was hospitalized in 2009. She was just 2 months at that time. Anyway, I just want to share how we spent our Christmas for 2011. 

my little brave girl, still smiling even with a dextrose!

beer session for the boys

another beer session , hihi

On the night before Christmas, we prepared a simple celebration for the Noche Buena. I was not able to take pictures that night because I forgot to charge the camera. On the Christmas day, as usual, we visited our parents in both sides. We intend to do this every year to instill in our daughter the value of respect and gratitude to our parents. We also want her to experience the Filipino tradition of visiting relatives and show respect by blessing ( mano in Filipino). This Christmas has been another special memory to remember. I am so grateful that every year we spend Jesus Christ’s birthday together with my family.

my sweet tot opening her gifts

Christmas is an expensive holiday for adults. But that makes me happy. It is very fulfilling whenever I give something to people who are special to me. It is also very touching whenever they remember us every Christmas thru through the gifts they give us, whether big or small.

God bless our family always

my little princess, isn't she adorable?

The whole year of 2011 has been a good year for us. God has showered us blessings. Yes, we encountered trials such as the miscarriage and few moments of sickness. But these trials were so little compared to the blessings and opportunities that God has provided us. I am not only speaking of the material things but also the priceless gifts that we received from Him. I am thankful for another year, for it means I have another chance to become a mom to my little one and a wife to my husband. May God continually bless our family, and shower us with love, happiness, health and peaceful life.